Sarcastically Patriotic Ice Cream
Company: Star Spangled Ice Cream Co.
Location: Baltimore, Md.
Introduced: March 2003
Details: Star Spangled entered the competitive frozen dessert market with four politically incorrect superpremium ice cream flavors: I Hate the French Vanilla, Iraqi Road, Smaller Govern-mint and Nutty Environmentalist. "We offer conservatives guilt-free ice cream," says Star Spangled Vice President Richard Lessner. "A portion of every purchase of Star Spangled Ice Cream goes to charities that support the great men and women in America's Armed Forces. At last, conservative Americans have an alternative to supporting Ben & Jerry's wacko liberal political causes from world peace utopianism to radical environmentalism. Conservatives now can enjoy a top-end, gourmet ice cream while supporting patriotic causes they truly believe in."
Distribution: Select East Coast markets and mail order