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    Jim Carper's holiday card to the dairy industry

    By James Carper
    December 11, 2015
    Reds and greens, and blues and whites,
    Snowflakes, snowmen, reindeer in sight.
    Mangers, wise men, menorahs and stars are reminders sectarian
    that another year is about to end again.
     
    Soon we’ll close the book on twenty-fifteen and
    St. Sylvester will wipe the slate clean.
    As he ushers in Two Zero One Six
    Be careful with those selfie sticks
    Posing for the Dairy Family Album
    Amid the teeming party scrum
    Underneath the mistletoe
    Warmed by drink and Yule log glow.
     
    Do you plan changes, perhaps resolutions?
    Speak up now. Remember:  elocution.
    You’ll need to meet people, those who can help.
    Use your network, your Rolodex. Don’t turn to Yelp!
     
    Write it in your daily planner
    to take a meeting with Greg Tanner.
    Others who you might want to be around
    are Miriam Erickson Brown,
    Warren Taylor, Steve Jones, Mike McCloskey,
    Gary Aggus and Andrei Mikhalevsky.
    Mike Nosewicz, Erin Sharp and Art Shank make milk better,
    So do Rachel Kyllo and the Bennetts. All rate a mention in this letter.
    Give the Feldkamp brothers, Steve and Doug, a heartfelt holiday hug. 
    Don’t forget organic dairymen George Siemon and Hirshberg, Gary.
    Call them now, don’t dawdle or tarry.
     
    Time to nibble. What’s on the buffet?
    At a dairy party, you guessed it: curds and whey.
    Is your pleasure Swiss or Cheddar? Whatever.
    Just don’t spill on your Christmas sweater
    Lino Saputo, James Sartori, Chris Policinski,
    James Leprino, Mark Davis and Ed Townley.
    Perhaps you prefer cheese on a Saltine?
    We ask you Fritz Leeman Don Boelens and Louie Gentine.
    If your pleasure is Laughing Cow, please tell us.
    Then go see Cyril Cledelin or Frederic Nailis.
    For Hispanic cheeses, talk to Nuestro Queso’s
    Mark Braun, John Nilson, Arturo Nava and Paul Esposito.
    Hilmar’s David Ahlem and John Jeter somehow make a party sweeter.
     
    Santa’s sleigh has alit near a chimney
    Maybe at the home of Julie Smolyansky.
    Or perhaps he’s at the Kruses, the Giffords, the Dagers of Ohio.
    Santa could be gifting Scottie Mayfield, for all that I know.
    We hear the sleigh bells’ jingle-jangles for Rick Smith and for Greg Engles.
    Now the reindeer are aloft. See them there, up in the sky-a?
    I hope the jolly man didn’t forget Hamdi Ulukaya,
    John and Jeff Kaneb, Brian Perry, Shelly Roth or the Drapers.
    Their gifts should be among the wrapping papers.
     
    Businesses don’t get far without associations
    Who advocate for those in the dairy vocations.
    I hear music. The dancing has started, oh my!
    Busting a move is Connie Tipton, Cary Frye,
    Ruth Saunders, Dave Carlin, Beth Hughes, Chelsee Woodey,
    Peggy Armstrong, Clay Hough, Ms. Hogan (Marti),
    Bob Yonkers, Neal Moran, John Allan and Emily Lyons
    as well as those with other association tie-ins
    like Brad Legreid and John Umhoefer of Wisconsin.
    Tom Gallagher and Julia Kadison (she of MilkPEP)
    Dip and swirl, matching every dance step.
    Do the Hustle Tammy Anderson-Wise.
    Peter Horvath and Jeff Sterne don’t dance. They’re guys.
     
    Our authors are not Grisham or Mailer,
    But we do have Sharon Gerdes and Allen Sayler.
    If you need a car, then just summon Uber.
    When we seek writers, we ask Tom Suber,
    Tim Rugh, Steven Young, Bruce Tharp, Phil Tong,
    Susan Larson, Kimberly Decker and Erin Quann.
    Clay Detlefsen writes about things sustainable
    whilst Jayne Randolph is all about making food safety attainable.
    John Lucey opines on cheese, nutrition’s by Greg Miller
    Their columns are fact-packed, no trace of filler.
     
    To my co-workers, a toast with a glass of cold cow.
    Dairy Foods succeeds because of your know-how
    in writing and selling and advert production and
    all the techy stuff that makes the web function.
    Thanks Tom, Amy, Barb, Adam, Sarah, Lisa, Kathleen,
    Suzanne, Lindsay, Josh and Cathy. Oh man, what a team!
     
    The party has ended. Thanks for dropping in.
    I enjoyed having you over, let’s do it again.
    Go home to your family. Celebrate the cheer
    and the reason for the season. I’ll see you next year.  
    KEYWORDS: dairy processor news

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    Jim Carper is the former editor-in-chief of Dairy Foods.

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